1. REMEMBER - THIS IS NOT YOUR FAULT.
I still have issues blaming myself for having anxiety, I'm not gonna lie; but IT IS NOT your fault. Mental illness is indeed the nastiest of nasty bitches - she doesn't care if you're rich, poor, young, old, skinny, fat or anything - she can bring you down at any point. Just like any other physical illness, our nervous systems get sick; so if you wouldn't think yourself a failure for having cancer, don't think you are for having depression or anxiety.
2. SURROUND YOURSELVES WITH THOSE WHO LOVE YOU
It is so easy to hide inside yourself, to curl up in bed and wait for it all to be over. But you know what? that wont help a damn bit! I'm not saying get out and party, lord knows you probably don't have the energy, but allow those who love you, and support you to remain in your life. Talk to them, confide, cry, greive, anything you need to do, knowing those who are beneficial to you will hold you up, when you aren't strong enough to.
3.BE OPEN, BE HONEST. SPEAK UP.
Don't keep the nastiness inside; noone can help you if they don't know what's going on in your head. I am very open about my anxiety, not everyone understands it, but you'll find an amazing amount of people that are fighting the same fight as you. And believe me, it feels so good to know it's not just you, you aren't unique in your craziness - and these people can show you different methods of coping, and share success stories.
4. THIS IS NOT FOREVER
Probably one of the hardest ones. The problem with anxiety and depression is they make you think the worst of any situation; and they make you believe you will live out the rest of your days in this mind funk. YOU WONT!!! This too shall pass -
5. EDUCATE YOURSELF
Ignorance isn't always bliss. Read. Research. Talk. There are so many awesome materials available to you online about depression and anxiety; and I'm not just talking wikipedia factuals (which do help, it's always good to know what's going on in the brain etc), but on blogs, websites, forums, anything where there are other people who have fought the fight and survived, or those who are currently fighting. One website I cannot rate highly enough is tinybuddha.com , it is full of articles, blogs, cartoons, all focussed on finding peace, I have spent hours pouring over some stories, and they will lift your heart.
6. WALK
I know excercise is the last thing you can be arsed doing, but I promise it helps - it doesn't have to be some full on regime either; go for a walk in the outdoors, get some fresh air and get your heart rate up. If you are agoraphobic, walk around your yard, walk to the postbox, walk 50 steps past your house. The endorphin release will help, you will be grateful for the spike in serotonin; and hell, appreciate how frigging awesome nature is.
7. GET A MASSAGE OR SOAK IN THE BATH
We all hold our tension in our bodies, which tends to make our anxieties worse. So relax your poor body, if you can't get a massage, invest in some lavendar oil and epsom salts, and soak in your bath. You deserve it.
8.ATTITUDE OF GRATITUDE
How many times i've wanted to punch someone in the face when they've told me to focus on the positives. yeah. ok... sometimes our positives can scare the shit out of us too. (my children are the biggest positive in my life, but when i'm at a low, thinking of them causes me pain; I feel like I'm failing them. so yes, positives can be bloody scary too).
My version of focussing on the positives are the little things, so at night, I've taken to writing down 10 things from the day that I am grateful for. They can be silly, like, 'I had a relaxing bath', or 'I didn't scream at the kids when I so wanted to', or whatever is your daily positive. Hell, it can even be 'Today i kept breathing'. Learning to focus on the good things, no matter how trivial, will train your brain to stop focussing only on the negatives.
9. BABY STEPS
Don't expect too much, too soon. Yes, we all want to be better in the click of the fingers - it aint gonna happen! This is a process, be kind to yourself.
10. LAUGH
Even if it's at yourself. Release those endorphins.
11.MEDITATE
I'm still learning how to 'properly' meditate, but so far, what works for me is to either do a guided mediation (there are so many online, or you can download apps to your phone), or to put relaxation music on, focus on my breathing, and try not to get caught up in internal chatter. yep, a few times i've fallen asleep, but either way, my mind and body have gotten some much needed reprieve.
No doubt I'll think of a million other things to write as soon as I publish this, but for now, these are things I'm doing on a near daily basis. They're not curing me, but they keep me breathing xoxo
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